Tag Archives: Stephenie Meyer

Eclipse

‘Peter Bradshaw only gave Eclipse one star’ said Daughter. I had to ask. ‘What’s Eclipse?’ It seems it was only the film we were about to go out and see an hour later. Oops. I knew it was one of the Twilight films, but I’ve long given up on remembering any actual facts.

When we got there, we almost left on the spot, seeing the long queue, until it transpired it looked long because they hadn’t actually opened the doors to let anyone in. Once they did it was fine. That was until Daughter told me to go and stand in the long queue to refreshments instead of the shorter ticket queue. Obedient soul that I am I did as I was told, and it turned out the ticket office was closed. For the first screening of Eclipse! So, the popcorn and fizzy drinks person sold tickets. Too. I could have done without the spilled drinks on the counter, seeing as it was tickets I was after.

Once in the auditorium of screen six we felt our way forward. It was pitch black. Slight safety risk there maybe? Sat down and ‘watched’ others search in the dark. The start time for the film came and went. Eventually someone came and made some light, and even managed to start some advertisements. Then the trailers. After an hour there the feature film actually started.

At this point I admitted to Daughter that I couldn’t quite remember how the second film had ended.

I find Robert Pattinson very annoying. Kristen Stewart is OK-ish, if only she didn’t bite her lip in deep thought so often. Taylor Lautner only trumps dear Edward because anyone would. Though as he said, he is hotter. Literally, of course.

They took a long time getting nowhere very much. Basically it’s two hours watching the two groups of adversaries defend Bella against something bad. If they’d only let her perish, they could all get on with their lives. Or non-lives for the pale lot.

She’s two-timing them for goodness’ sake!

It’ll have to be Shrek next time. I need something real.

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Vampires v Werewolves

Werewolves that aren’t governed by full moons. What’s the world coming to? Despite not being a very doggie person I’ll have to go on the W side in this war of monsters, all wanting to be loved by Bella. The vampires are just too silly.

OK, so it was a half moon today when we walked home from watching New Moon. It wasn’t nearly as bad a film as I had feared. In fact, the film is quite good, and it’s not its fault that it’s based on a rather iffy book. Or so say I, who haven’t bothered reading the books. Because I haven’t had time, obviously. They are sitting waiting hopefully, but are sinking further down the pile every day. Daughter told me in no uncertain terms that New Moon is her favourite of the four books, so I’m clearly in the wrong.

I think maybe I’ll not read the books at all, if only to be able to judge whether the films make sense if you don’t already know the story. With Harry Potter I’ve always felt that without the books you are sunk. So far I’m all right with not losing the plot.

We chose early afternoon in order to avoid the screamers, and were entirely successful. The cinema was almost deserted, in fact. I was in the lull of migraine, but just about well enough to survive the film. It was the 25 minutes of advertising and trailers which nearly finished me off. They were more plentiful, louder and flashier than I have ever noticed before. The feature film was beautifully dark and quiet after that, and the tea and smuggled-in gingernuts helped, too.

New Moon

From my Facebook friends I had learned that I must go (zeitgeist, I gather), and also that there was a high bare chest count. There was, but I can’t say any of them did much for me. Not enough hair. And we liked Jake better after the haircut.

Other than Bella discovering that having a vampire boyfriend isn’t her only problem, she finds her best friend is a werewolf. Statistically one feels it’s a bit much to have so many monsters in the middle of the woods, but it’s fiction, after all. What do they all see in Bella, anyway? And why is she so dithery? Felt that poor Jake was unfairly treated.

Go see it. It’s not bad. Silly, yes.

Vampires, anyone?

I should have said yes. In retrospect, I know I should have grasped the opportunity – preferably with both hands – to come face to face with a fake vampire. Even Daughter was surprised to hear I’d been invited to the press conference with the New Moon vampires. Sorry, actors. But, I wonder if I’d have ignored it even if travelling to London hadn’t been slightly inconvenient that day? I think I might, because I’m not a teenager, and I have yet to understand the greatness of the Twilight saga and its films.

And I’m not a slave to Robert Pattinson’s charms. Opening any paper this week has informed me that everyone else is. Oh, well.

I will go and see the film. I’m fairly sure of that. With all the hoo-hah in the press, even I know that it’s out this week. Otherwise I wouldn’t have had a clue, let alone gone looking for the answer to my un-asked question. Book one is still sitting in a might-actually-read-this-one-day-in-the-next-year (or not) position. Maybe I should tell it not to get its hopes up.

I will be busy this coming week, so no telling when I’ll get to a cinema near me. I’ll want to avoid the crowds of wannabe vampires, though.

Twilight

There is something about the title that makes me feel tired. Maybe I have been bitten by a vampire. I didn’t know they don’t sleep.

Daughter had been going on about my need to see Twilight for weeks, so we marched off to the cinema at the weekend, before the film was off the menu. Our arrival was timed to such perfection that we only had half a mobile phone advert before getting to the feature, so I’ll have to work on this getting late to films. The screen had a little hole in it, which I couldn’t help staring at for most of the film, so I suppose I didn’t concentrate as much as I should have.

I had hoped seeing the film would absolve me from the need to read the books. Now I just wonder if the books may be better, because the film didn’t quite do it for me. It was entertaining enough, but very ridiculous. Daughter told me I’d like Edward/Robert Pattinson as the film went on, but all I saw was someone dead. Cedric Diggory, to be precise. With the white face, he looked dead, not swoon material. I’m obviously too old for this.

Kristen Stewart as Bella was really good, but I don’t know why she couldn’t have hooked up with some of the normal teenagers, or that nice young Native American from the reservation. Though I believe there are werewolves to come, so it could be a frying pan/fire kind of problem.

The scenery of Washington (state) was a little too Swedish for my comfort. All those forests..! Even the school looked like something I might have attended.

Toadly. (My new word from Twilight. Often spelled totally.)